FLAT OUT — GREAT FRIENDS ROCK!

(ON THE FRIENDSHIP CAFÉ)

Not surprisingly, friendship figures at the top of most everyone’s list when researchers ask, “What gives meaning to your life?” It follows that friendship is truly one of the best gifts we can give ourselves. Legendary jazz vocalist Billie Holiday once said, “If I don’t have friends, then I ain’t nothing.”

Great friends enrich our minds, inspire our imaginations, and enlighten our spirits. To be happy, we require friends in our lives because we have needs. It’s rather tricky — probably impossible — for us as individuals to fulfill all our needs by ourselves. One friend may satisfy a certain need and another friend may satisfy a different need.

The key to winning the friendship game is having real friends — and not merely companions (friends vs. acquaintances). For a friendship to succeed, however, it must work both ways in all respects.

You must trust your friends, and they must trust you. You must be getting something of value from them, and they must be receiving something of equal value from you. You must find them pleasant to be around, and they must find you just as pleasant.

One neat thing is that you can have many types of friends: Male friends. Female friends. Casual friends. Good friends. Great friends. You can have different friends for different reasons and different occasions. Best of all, you can have one person whom you consider your overall best friend.

The fascinating thing about friends is that you get to choose them, unlike relatives whom you have to endure at family gatherings, or colleagues with whom you have to share space in a workplace. Another great thing about friends is that you can dump them much easier than relatives or work colleagues when you no longer want them around.

Of course, people get to choose you as a friend — and they can dump you pretty fast if they no longer want you around. After all, the friendship game is full of surprises — some remarkably pleasant and some not all that pleasant.

While it may appear accidental, it’s possible to dramatically increase the chances of meeting a new friend or two — and keeping them as friends forever. This is the really cool part: Once you understand the fundamentals of friendship, you may never have to be without any true friends. Ever again!

Best of all, real friends will support you in your pursuit of your personal goals and ambitions much more than colleagues that you encounter in a typical workplace or acquaintances that you casually meet in a pub.

Real success in life means that you have a lot of time to spend with your friends — and are in fact doing so. This leads to an important reminder: If you are working hard to attain whatever success means to you, but don’t have time to make any real friends, or spend time with ones you already have, you haven’t attained real success! After all, isn’t having great times with great friends what a great life is ultimately all about?

All things considered, great friends make life complete. Have you ever noticed that when you have dinner at a restaurant with a good friend, a mediocre meal will end up tasting like gourmet? Good friends will also make a long journey seem a lot shorter. They will be there to make you feel better if you get into a fight with a spouse, colleague, or relative.

Best of all, even ten minutes in the company of a good friend will make any gruesome day worth living. Ultimately, great friendship doubles your joys and extinguishes most of your sorrows.

At this time it is worth remembering one of the most important aspects of friendship: With a real friend by your side, nothing is ever so good that it can’t get better. This is what makes the difficult task of nurturing great friends so worthwhile.

The truth is that you may go broke, become divorced, and get fired — but as long as you have real friends to spend time with, you still have life and happiness. Indeed, best friends are the most important ingredient in the recipe for having a full, relaxed, satisfying, and happy life.

EPILOGUE: Pets. Spouses. Kids. Relatives. These are all worth having. Even homes, careers, money, and possessions are okay in their own ways. But, flat out — great friends rock!

COPYRIGHT © 2011 by Ernie J. Zelinski

  All Rights Reserved 

Note: This article is excerpted from the book 101 Really Important Things You Already Know But Keep Forgetting by Ernie J. Zelinsk

Friendship Quotes and Sayings

about Great Friend 

Great friends will appear in your life when you
are doing the right things for them to appear.
— from Life's Secret Handbook for Having
Great Friends

The things I want to know are in books;
my best friend is the man who'll get me
a book I ain't read.
— Abraham Lincoln

As great as wine is on its own, sharing it in
good company makes it that much better. This
is true even when the bottle is never opened.
— Ingrid Steffensen

It is a great confidence in a friend to tell him
your faults; greater to tell him his.
— Benjamin Franklin

A true friend is the greatest of all blessings,
and that which we take the least care to
acquire.
— La Rochefoucauld

Above all, great friends make retirement
complete.
— from How to Retire Happy, Wild, and
Free 

Friendship, like the immortality of the soul, is
too good to be believed.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

When money is lost, little is lost;
When time is lost, much more is lost;
When health is lost, practically everything is
gone;
And when friends are lost, there is nothing left.
— from Life's Secret Handbook for Having
Great Friends by Ernie Zelinski

An honest answer is the sign of true
friendship.
— Proverbs 24:26

To like and dislike the same things, that is
indeed true friendship.
— Sallust

Great friends settle their accounts speedily.
— Chinese Proverb.

Wanna see who your real friends are? Screw
up and see who's still there.
— Unknown

WEBSITE AND ALL CONTENT

COPYRIGHT © 2011 by Ernie J. Zelinski